Nurture Your Child Not Your Ego

Parents should never leave their ego wrapped up in their child. Many parents measure their own value and the success of their childrenâ € ™ s, the successes and failures. The children behave like children, and not propose steps early enough, or not live, did not result in a parentâ € ™ s unrealistic expectations, it can have disastrous consequences for the parents and the healthy development of their children. The parent, will focus on the child can be compared to whom the child.

A perfect example of a parent never satisfied with his sonâ € ™ s reached, the mother of a preteen tennis player. If another mother about his sonâ € ™ capabilities, tennis playerâ € ™ s mother replied through his teeth fixed, â € œWell, heâ € ™ s not Roger Federer.â € (referring to a number of world tennis, living legend, and perhaps the greatest player in history.)

The motherâ € ™ s response is typical of a parent for his child hopelessly surprise and dazzle the world. His expectations were devastating for themselves and their children. He flew to compare the joy to see his son play, and because even Meryl Streep isnâ € ™ a good actress to hide, to the disappointment of the type of mother who felt childâ € ™ s holds, self-confidence was probably suffering as a reason for his love of work.

The flip side of the coin is that the parent, the whole credit for the childâ € ™ of the success and created a series of identity to this child. The parent is seeking an extraordinary child. The parent is special because the child specifically. The child is responsible for the parents a sense of self-esteem.

It is important for the parents why their ego their parental duties. Once the umbilical cord, the children begin their journey of life and on the hands, although caution for parents is essential for their growth, the children earn their own frustrations and successes. The parents are then able to comfort, to promote, applaud, the feeling of pride and love to express.

Nehmend personally for parents for parents is also much more difficult. Unable or denies the child to see realistic that the parents, lack of skills, savoir-vivre and behaviour have to work, and then the parents frustrated and confused when the child. Â € œBut my child is gifted, why is it not potty train? I have a bad mother.â €

Recently, a well-known expert on parent was quoted in the New York Times, â € œThe about very young that they lying fallow, â € says Dr. Karp. Â € œOur job is to civilize, to say to them, if you like it, and thank you, € ™ t not spit and nothing, not € ™ t pee where you want. Those are the jobs that came with a toddler.â €

For a parent, that his ego empêtrés with their little ones, Dr. â € ™ preview image above would be terribly offensive, and even insulting. Instead of saying, â € œYes, that's exactly what I do with my life quite small - and I mean everything really enjoy helping small - to civilized, â € œ she says, â € œHow dare say that my uncivilized.â child is € The mother is not able to see that the reality Dr.â € ™ declaration is not a personal attack, he said that his role is important, and it is normal, 'Have a child , which doesnâ € ™ t really understand the social skills and with his love and the training of children to learn.

His goal, and the borders with junior is an important step in the direction of the ego is not possible to get wrapped up in the child. Â € œHelicopter Parentsâ € or parents who hover, are very, in their way inappropriate, often, the children and adults have falsified, the gap between them and their child.

For example, it is now to the parents to come to the defence of their children, who have a poor quality or were challenged by a teacher. Your ego will be damaged if their child needs correcting, and in response to the hair and professional challenge. The term â € € œhelicopter parentingâ was invented to describe those parents in inpatient flight.

A real example of the incredible, but â € € œhelicopter parentingâ happen if a large insurance. The father, a smart, well-educated and capable, twenty-five years, the woman called his boss to talk about his performance. Weeks later, the young woman even miss a flight, a meeting should take that up with their boss. Understandingly It is said that he directly to the office and work. On the contrary, he has 8 hours train walk in the town to try to attend the meeting, in any case. When he asked why they do not like it at the office was instructed she replied, â € œMy mother told me that I am in the meeting.â €

Parenting without a healthy ego to develop self-awareness and the children. The children know their parentâ € ™ love and feel for what they are and not what they have to follow. If the parents allow their children to their own population, which is an extension of themselves, the children start to take responsibility for their own decisions, and may not like, the good and the bad behavior and the election. By establishing the boundaries between parents and the child, the child has become independent and feel not in a hurry for excellence in the hope that their parents feel respected.

An excerpt from a poem, the beautiful summarizes this topic in Kahlil Gibranâ € ™ s The Prophet:

Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of life itself. They come through you but not from you, and though they are with you, they do not belong to you. You may give them your love but not your thoughts. For they have their own thoughts. You can host their bodies, but not their souls, for their souls reside in the house of tomorrow, which you can not visit, not even in your dreams. You can try to be like them, but not trying to do, as you do.